Closure, sweet closure

So... it's been a while! I've played with the idea of coming back to write in this blog more times than you can imagine, but... well, I'm a perfectionist. And I'm also really lazy. So if I can't write something pretty close to perfect on the first draft, I'm unlikely to write anything at all.

Yes, excuses, I know.

But things have been happening in my little hockey world that I'd love to be able to look back on and remember. Things that might not matter to most people, but to me, on that day, they are my world.

Then I start thinking about the things that happened say, a few games ago, and how I would have loved to have written them down. And then I start thinking that I shouldn't make my first post in over a year a gigantic recap... cuz who really wants to read or write that?? And well, you see how it goes.

More excuses.

So let's just jump right in here. With the great little hockey things that happened today. And just today.

My Ducks are out of the playoffs. Detroit beat them in a game 7, and it wasn't even close. Like many of my hockey friends, I was stunned. It's that thing that happens to every sports fan at some point: the team you've rallied behind all season, the team you've rearranged your work and social schedules around, the team you were so looking forward to watching in the playoffs... they lose. And it's over. And your offseason begins.

And you wake up the next morning feeling like everything has just become so pointless.

What tears me up most is watching the players on the bench, on the ice, in the handshake line. Even if it isn't my team, I get teary and emotional because you know how hard they worked to get there. In the case of my Ducks, they put together such a fantastic regular season. So many franchise records matched and broken, so many guys trying to be the hero. I wanted to give each one of them a hug and thank him for giving us fans such a treat.

Especially the veterans. Don't even get me started on what I felt for Saku Koivu and Teemu Selanne. Or guys that I'm fairly certain won't be back with us next season; my favorite Matthew Lombardi, in particular.

I needed to do something about the horrible feeling of despair that was so much more intense this time than in seasons past. So I made some signs.




Yes, they might be considered silly, but I do these for me as much as I do them for the players.

And I taped them up on the cyclone fence that borders the construction site at the South entrance of the Honda Center. My hope was that the guys might see them as they came in for exit interviews the next day. The Bobby sign actually didn't go up that day. I had run out of poster board and made it on paper instead. Upon arriving at HC, I realized the sign wasn't going to survive unless it was a poster board.

You bet I thought about it all day at work and pondered the possibility of going back the next morning with a poster board. I rescheduled a doctor's appointment so I'd be able to go before my work shift. The things I do for Bobby. Seriously!

As it turned out, it was a good thing I went back!! There was a small group of people hanging around the usual spot, waiting for players. I wasn't initially planning to hang out, but I took my Bobby sign and the gift I'd made Teemu Selanne (JUST IN CASE) cuz you never know. I parked, taped Bobby's sign up with the others, and then turned around... right into Matthew Lombardi.

Stunned. Speechless. The usual, only worse considering I completely wasn't expecting him.

"Hey there! How are you? How's it going?" Lombo is always so kind when he sees me. I always forget the multitude of things I want to say to him. All I can manage is a hi, I'm good, and how are you back. I wanted to ask if he was injured cuz, well, I'd been wondering...

Ugh.

"Kinda sucks with playoffs over, but you know, hanging in there," I try to put together a few coherent words. He nods and looks as uncomfortably shy as I feel. The usual.

"Well," I push on, not wanting him to leave. "I wish you'd gotten more ice time, I mean, I really wanted to see you play... do you think... you might want to stay?"

"Nah," he looks down at his feet, "it didn't work out... But I know I'll see you around," and he gave me a shy smile.

"That's too bad, I loved having you here for what, like 3 games?" I joked and he laughed, "yeah." "But you know I'll see you in the next city."

He smiled, "for sure," and gave me a hug.

"Oh, and if I'd known I was going to run into you today, I would have brought the jersey!"

*sigh* It almost seems a tease to have him here for such a short time. But I want him to be happy. And I know he isn't happy being benched all the time. The dump and chase, cycle and grind system doesn't work for him. So, I hope Lombo returns to Phoenix, where he has fans and a coaching staff that knows how to utilize his talents. And good friends like Shane Doan, whose family I know is close with his.

And I'll still be able to see him, unlike when he went to Toronto.

Anyway.

I visit Bob, bringing him some Starbucks I'd picked up along the way. Don't get a chance to chat long, but that's okay, I'm not staying. I wander outside for a few minutes, watching Viktor Fasth, Daniel Winnik, and a few others make their way out. I try not to be seen by players that I'm not actively wanting to interact with... just something I've noticed I do.

And then I hear someone say, "Teemu!" Perfect. A small line of fans forms next to him, allowing him to make his way from person to person, signing autographs and posing for pictures. Teemu is always so sweet about this, giving everyone a few seconds of his time. I stand at the end of the line, and as he finishes with the person in front of me and his eyes focus on mine, I smile and hand him his gift.

"I made this for you," I say, steadily and evenly because Teemu has never made me tongue-tied. Don't know why. "It's just a little something to say thank you. I hope you come back next year, but if you don't, thank you so much, for everything."

A grin slowly spreads across his face as he looks at the gift, probably remembering exactly when those pictures were taken. I understand he has a great memory for those things. "Thank you," he says, and then reaches over for a hug. As his left arm draws me in, I feel him give me a kiss over my right ear. "Thank you for this."

You're so welcome, Teemu. These are the moments I love. To make them as happy as they've made me... you can't put a price on that.

After Teemu leaves, I contemplate if I should stay any longer. Mission accomplished, so to speak. And then I see Bobby Ryan heading my direction, signing a few things for fans. He sees me and his face lights up, "Hey Christina!"

Even after nearly four years of friendship, it's still exciting that he knows my name.

He gives me a hug and asks how things are. I know he doesn't usually like to talk hockey, so I don't bring it up. "Getting close," I tell him, "Five more months!"

 "Wow, that is close! So you know, I think it's gonna happen this weekend. I'm gonna do it this weekend."

"Oh my gosh, really?? That's so great!"

"Yeah, I just can't figure out... like, I'm trying to plan it. Should I pop the question here or in Idaho?"

"Idaho would be nice," I said, "Quiet and you guys can soak it in..."

"That's what I thought, but then I know she's gonna want to be on the phone telling everyone... and reception isn't that great out there... And I'd like her mom to be there..."

"In that case, do it here. Before you guys leave for Idaho," I say. "I'm so excited for you! Does she have any idea?"

"No, she doesn't, so mums the word! But it's been hard cuz she keeps asking about it... and I'm avoiding it even more cuz I already know I'm gonna do it, you know? I think she's going to be surprised." Bobby is all grins as he's telling me this. I love how excited he is.

I wink at him, "you know, I've always liked her. I'm glad you're puttin' a ring on this one!"

"Yeah," he jokes, "she's good for me."

"Well, let me know how it goes!" He gives me another hug and is on his way.

I'm just getting over Bobby's news as Luca Sbisa comes through. Another big hug. I only get hugs from certain players, but those are the special ones that I know remember me. Today Luca smells like heaven, by the way. "Thanks for such a great season!" I tell him. "Ah, thank YOU for all of your support!"

That's what fans do, Luca.

And what do I find out later in the day? Team injury pressor: "Trade deadline pickup Matthew Lombardi may require surgery on his left shoulder after being diagnosed with an ailment a week after he was acquired by the Ducks."

Bingo.